Sozinha na festa de Casamento

Sozinha na festa de casamento: Chega de pânico!

(Colaboração para a Revista Caras, portal Noivas)

Postado por Caras às 16/08/2012 – 17:38

Hoje muitas mulheres acham normal sair desacompanhadas, mas outras ainda ficam apavoradas com a ideia de chegar sozinha em uma festa ou na balada. E você, faz parte de qual grupo?

Sem companhia para ir à festa? Arme-se de coragem e vá sozinha: ou você prefere ficar em casa a se divertir?

Antes só do que mal acompanhada. Você já deve ter ouvido esse ditado popular. Muito se fala sobre a mudança no comportamento das mulheres nas últimas décadas, desde que as feministas queimaram sutiãs em praça pública em 1968. Mas certas crenças e valores parecem ter resistido a essa revolução. Algumas mulheres, por exemplo, nunca tomam a iniciativa da paquera, pois acham que esse é um papel exclusivamente masculino. Outras se recusam a ir a eventos desacompanhadas, com medo do que os outros vão pensar. “Em uma situação como essa, a própria mulher pode estar se julgando e acaba se sentindo constrangida”, diz a psicóloga Adriana Takahashi. “O ato de julgar está na maior parte das pessoas, aprendemos a agir dessa forma desde crianças”, acrescenta.

A cerimonialista Beth Kos, que organiza dezenas de casamentos todos os anos e tem a oportunidade de observar algumas situações, acha que o cenário se transformou nos últimos anos. “O comportamento das mulheres mudou muito. Elas saem sozinhas, vão jantar, vão ao cinema, por que não a casamentos?”, pergunta. “As moças vão sós e, muitas vezes, com seus carros. Não bebem, se divertem e, na hora que acham que podem ‘virar abóbora’, desaparecem!”, conta.

E por que os homens não se sentem constrangidos ao chegar sozinhos em festas e baladas? “Com os homens é diferente, pois existe um preconceito (tanto de homens como das mulheres). É algo enraizado, cultural, uma condição imposta pela sociedade: se a mulher não tem ninguém, é vista como ‘encalhada’”, diz a psicóloga. E, cá entre nós, quem nunca fez esse comentário maldoso ao ver uma moça chegar sozinha a um evento? “Hoje em dia esse preconceito vem diminuindo, mas se livrar do estigma imposto por tantos anos não é tarefa fácil”, lembra Adriana.

Mas Beth acredita que as mulheres estão usufruindo cada vez mais da liberdade que conquistaram e mudando alguns comportamentos. “Muitas mulheres combinam de ir juntas, ou com amigos convidados”, diz. “Mas não pedem mais, como a um tempo atrás, para levar um acompanhante do sexo oposto”, revela. Ir com amigos é uma solução válida para quem não se sente à vontade de chegar sozinha. Afinal, a ideia é se sentir bem e se divertir.

Mas, na nossa humilde opinião, chegar sozinha não deveria gerar uma crise existencial. Afinal, estar sozinha não significa ser só. E, como tudo na vida, é uma questão de prática. Arme-se de coragem e faça ao menos uma tentativa antes de dizer que não consegue. E lembre-se: deixar de ir só porque não tem companhia é uma grande bobagem: você pode estar perdendo uma ótima chance de se divertir e conhecer pessoas novas.  “Ser e agir diferente da maioria não é para qualquer um. É preciso estar segura, sustentar a sua escolha (de ser ou estar sozinha), independentemente do que os outros vão pensar ou falar”, afirma a psicóloga. E isso vale para todos os aspectos da vida.

E você? Se não está namorando e é convidada para um casamento, fica constrangida de ir sozinha ou vai mesmo assim? Conte pra gente na nossa fan page: www.facebook.com/carasnoivas

Por Ana Paula de Andrade

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